The Epic Adventures of Prince Ralphie

Authored by Robert Augustus Gerard & Georgiana Spadafora

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

Robert began life on an island in the south Pacific where he lived in a tropical paradise for the first years of his life. When he was ten he moved with his family to Texas, where many unexpected calamities befell them. His father, a soldier for the Empire, died in the Great War on Ignorance, on the wrong side of history. Later, his mother died of grief, so that at fifteen Robert was orphaned, as were his siblings, who were scattered like seeds to the winds of time and fate and chance to find purchase where they could.

After many years of wandering through other people’s kingdoms alone and disorientated, he came across a treasure of ideas so comprehensive in their scope of how the cosmos really works, even where beauty touches the hem of God, that he recognized these beliefs and ideas were the treasure he’d been searching for his whole life. He’d found the key to the kingdom, his kingdom. He then sat down and wrote about how writing had become the Path, his Path back to his home, on an island of his own set upon the sea of the imagination.

Georgiana began her life in Hannibal Missouri, the child of Hungarian immigrants displaced in the chaos of the second world war.

Shortly thereafter, her father moved their little family to Cleveland, Ohio, where she grew up with her sister in a largely Hungarian neighborhood, allowing them to keep their many treasured traditions of recipes, dances, and holiday celebrations.

She is one of those few people who knew from the very beginning that they were destined to be an artist.

GAINING ACCESS TO RALPHIE’S EXPLOITS

As the writers behind this

collection of speeches, journal entries, and well-known exploits of Prince Ralphie, it is intended to provide future knight errants instruction on the nature of proper questing and derring-do through the recounting of some of the youthful escapades of the legendary knight errant,

Sir Ralphie Augustus of the Kingdom of the Verbose.

It was only by outstanding good fortune, by way of meeting Professor Alexandre, Ralphie’s one-time academic tutor, that we were able to access many of Ralphie’s travel journals, along with some notes from a few of his grandest speeches, to work with in this limited re-creation of the innumerable heroic, historical, and sometimes serendipitous exploits that Ralphie took part in over the time of his questing.

Not only were we fortunate enough to have Ralphie’s journals, as well as Professor Alexandre’s testimony, we discovered that parts of Ralphie’s legend had also been preserved in other contexts, recorded by numerous other writers, in innumerable other epic adventure stories.

So, for the astute reader, traces of his dragon tracks can be discovered in many other books—you just have to use your imagination, and you’ll find him standing right in front of you!

EXCERPTS FROM PRINCE RALPHIE’S JOURNALINGS

On the process of becoming a ‘proper philosopher prince’ …

Only through knowing deeply, ourselves, can we ever hope to lead others.

On the process of gaining a worldly education by questing …

Only through the education gained by way of rough experience can a neophyte knight advance in wisdom of himself and therefore compassion for the people of the kingdom.

On the process of creating a philosophical kingdom …

You don’t need violence to rule the world, you need grace … mercy … and hope.